Well as you all know (well if you managed to find my website you probably know me in some way) i am now in georgia training to be a gov't law enforcemnent agent. It is very hot and humid here, today its 95 and 80% humidity and the locals told me this is late spring to them. makes me excitied for those 3-4-5 mile runs i will be doing.
i was going to take some pictures and show you the places, things and my fairly awesome room (no joke its pretty sweet, its like a decent size hotel room) around the base but i forgot that its the goverment and i would probably lose my job if i took any pictures of the funtivities i do here.
with that being said, things have been going pretty good, i have to get up by about 5:30am if i want to make the 6am bus(they bus us around the campus, its probably a 15min walk to the dinner hall from the dorms) to breakfast in time so i can eat and still make it to lineup before our class coordinator comes inspects us. one guy wore the wrong belt and was told to run back to the dorm and back with the correct belt on. now i know its only 7am but its still like 80 degrees and 100% humidity still that early, plus we are in full gear, that totally sucked for that guy.
Thursday our class had our inital PT test and also some PT fun time with the PT instructor, it sucked way bad, but here are some select quotes and conversations during that first session
"Open your eyes, this is not a dream, yes the mats are blue"
--ok i was trying not to laugh at this one, i dont know if he was trying to yell at me or if he thought i was colorblind
"You are not a snake, stop slithering on the ground"
--if i hadent been in so much pain and in push up position i would have been laughing, one of the guys was getting so tired he just went down while in push up position
"Stop panting, you are not a dog"
--interesting choice of motiviational yelling
"you can quit at anytime, there are 3 exit doors in this room, in fact one of them has a green lit up exit sign on it"
--wow really?, hmm, if i entered the room from a door i think i would be capable of finding the same door out, but thank you sir.
here is one of my favorites this is a conversation between one of the trainiees and a PT instructor. we were about 30min into tourture stretching and position holding and at this point we were told to have our arms straight out in front of us like frankenstien
PT Guy: "Do you think you could hold this gun"
Trainiee: "Yes, Sir"
PT Guy: "Are you sure"
Trainiee: "Yes, Sir"
--PT Guy then puts his rubber fake gun back in the holster and walks away defeated, this was soo funny but none of us dared laughing. the funny part about this whole thing was there was about 5 other PT instructors in the room and this was the first time this guy spoke up and tried yelling at one of us, all i could picture was him sitting at home the night before thinking to himself ideas of ways to "motivate" us to do better and all of a sudden he comes up with this great line, he writes it down on scrap paper and puts it into his short shorts (they all wear short shorts, why, i think its an ego thing...Also, i had no idea why i was required to wear shorts that even NBA players from 1982 would consider too short)
"Why are you shaking, You are not a salt shaker"
--wait what?
anyway so thats kinda a summary of how things are going soo far, i've been trying to work on my reviews for mexico, but with training about 12 hours a day (by the time i get back to my room its 5:30) i dont have much motivation to attempt to be funny.
If you guys are bored or just want to laugh at me, give me a call, and i'll tell you stories that will make your bad day look like a day at the beach, or at least make it not as bad.
later
Kubz
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